I often ‘write’ pieces in my head, editing them over and over before they end up either in a journal, (now) on this blog or, more often than not, in the dark recess of my mind to be recalled and reworked at any time before being placed safely back where it will never see the light of day.
Yesterday morning started off like so many others, I started ‘writing’ as I got out of bed, continued as I took my little man on our daily walk and added more still as I showered and dressed. The piece was pretty much just me having a good old whinge. I’m not talking about a little whinge here, it was full blown.
No, nobody said life was supposed to be fair. Yes, everyone has something to deal with. Yes, there are people worse off than me. But you know what? Today, I don’t care. I don’t care about all the rational arguments you can throw at me. Today, I’m annoyed at all the meds I have to take. I’m angry that my morning routine takes longer than it should because I have to factor in stretching under the heat of the shower, resting before, during and after said shower. I’m p*ssed off that…
Okay, you get the picture. What a cheerful read that would have been! Anyway, I was busy in the ‘editing’ stages when a Twitter notification came through. Defypain had shared my post about patience. How lovely. That post was not one of my more popular pieces. I wonder if people will read it? Surely I can’t be alone in struggling with patience?
Then came the mood change. An unexpected tweet from a UK Tweeter friend.
That was all it took. In less than 140 characters I (received a slight ego boost and) was reminded that I am not alone. I am so lucky and so thankful to have a wonderful, supportive community of family and friends who would, and do, do anything to help me. The one thing they can’t do however, is understand what having fibromyalgia is like. Even my mum, who has been through every step of my pain journey with me, even she cannot truely understand what it is I deal with on a daily basis.
Now however, now after a short couple of months online, I have found a beautiful community of people from all over the globe who understand 100% what I am going through. After 23 years of chronic pain I have found a group of people who understand a part of me that I’ve had to keep, at least in part, to myself. The feeling Tracey’s tweet brought me cannot be explained or underestimated. Thank you online friends. I hope you know how special you are.